Wednesday, November 25, 2015

concert attire [sponsored]

Lately, I've had the chance to go to more concerts than I usually would. It's a combination of dumb luck (my bands coming to town) and low gas prices (Nashville is a fuuuuuun drive...).

Anyhow, I've been able to see a lot of shows, and lately, my concert attire is pretty much the same. Black skinny jeans, black crop top, boots, and flannel over top. (eShakti actually sent my go-to piece... and I left it at a concert. I suck. )

For this post, I just wanted to share some concert inspiration. I've been a fan of the 90s for a while, so while it's gone back in style, I've been snatching up as many pieces as I can. I've really been all about Frances Bean Cobain's look, mixed with an appropriate level of tackiness (because of who I am as a person ha), and Friends, seasons 1-2.

Anyhow, huzzah!

(c/o eshakti)

Wednesday, November 4, 2015

cold gusts of wind (winter playlist part 1)

Magazine-- Pedro the Lion

Mt. Washington -- Local Natives

West Coast -- Coconut Records

Blood Moon -- Deer Tick

The Letter -- The Blackheart Procession

Brazil -- Declan McKenna

I'll Fight -- Wilco

Obstacles -- Syd Matters

Wayfaring Stranger -- Jamie Woon

I'm Not Gonna Call You -- The Films

Same Side -- The Casket Girls

The Crystal Ship -- The Doors

The Way It Goes - Gillian Welch

Monday, June 22, 2015

lucifer was a lover

I've had the humbling experience of meeting and working with some talented singer/songwriters in the Huntsville area. We play at coffee shops, bars around town (although I'm not really up to par on that yet), house shows, and other intimate settings. Having these experiences have really helped me to channel my energy into something. My stage fright has decreased dramatically, I feel good about myself, and I can see improvement. I'm not where I want to be, but it's nice to create something and build towards getting there.

Wednesday, June 17, 2015


This is something small that I wrote and wanted to post here; hopefully it reads well!


I imagined my body decaying and melting into the carpet. My mind recalled the phenomenon after death when the deceased’s blood settles, a patchy mottling of skin, causing a horrifying yet beautiful discoloration.  Death’s kiss-- bruised purples and pinks, a farewell firing sunset fanning out on corpse. I pictured my flesh speckled and unfashionably pale

My own romantic tendencies had me barring the more grotesque aspects of decay. There’d be no bloating, no stench. I’d be a body, sprawled perhaps, but in a slumbered position. For an instant, I imagined the gore, my skin flayed and cackled, peeling and dehydrated, rotten and raw, but the ugliness of it was searing.

I visualized my face. Muscles relax after death, and eyeballs tend to sink back into sockets. Eyelids creep open. Would my eyes would be open, looking without seeing as they so often did in life? I thought of a dead fish floating in the river, washing up on shore. I could see its glassy eyes, receding and decaying slowly. Eyes, which were never a window to anything, but rather a clump of very useful cells, open as though aware.

Would someone lay coins on my eyelids? I imagined stitches sewing my eyes in a grotesque manner perhaps more suited for a horror film.

I told myself to shut up and I smoked a cigarette. I went to bed that night, and visions of fish and decay and death’s kiss haunted me.


Hello to any humans, aliens, or internet robots that may have stumbled across this page.

I used to blog at Laughing With Broken Eyes. I started this blog in high school and maintained it up through college, though my posts became infrequent. While I won't say I'm ashamed of the blog, a lot of the posts are very melodramatic, annoying, and somewhat embarrassing. I look at it and don't see an accurate depiction of who I am presently. I was too swept up in the notion of being a ~lovely blogger and became too fixated on cultivating an image of myself. This carried in to my life and made me very unhappy; after a very difficult time, mentally, last February, I stepped away from social media for a while and took some time to work on myself.

I don't plan on deleting too many of my old posts (unless something pops up that just makes me cringe) because this is a digital journal of who I was and how I became who I am, but on that same note, I'm not planning on posting every single day or blogging how I used to. Granted, I started this blog when I was seventeen, and I'm now twenty-three, so of course it's different (hell, I know I am).

I drink, smoke, curse, etc. I'm extremely flawed and won't act as though I'm not. 

Anyhow, I miss some aspects of the blogging community and figured I will throw my hat back in there to see if it's still something I enjoy.